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Just a thought
Over the last year, I have been reintroduced to the most complicated game ever played….the dating game. I had forgotten how much fun and lack of
fun it could be. As I get older the game gets more complicated. In your early to mid twenties people date just to date. Seldom are the long term thoughts
complicating the situation, but two people are together simply because they enjoy each others company.
Upper twenties and dare I say it thirties shuffles in a whole new set of rules. Every first date that I go on now both of us sit across from each other and
size each other up job interview style to see if suitable candidacy is there. Initial attraction is still the foundation for making it to that first date scenario.
Every "couple' starts off that way, but then the questions start quickly start kicking in; Are they good marriage? Where is this going? Are they a morning
person? How are they set financially? Do they snore? Wonder what our kids would look like" Do they even want kids" And my favorite "Is this the best I
can do? We play the game for a while go through the motions constantly aware of the decision trigger on the gun that holds the breakup bullet that may
or not be pulled. Help us all if one or the other decides to fire that shot.
Why is it that the most interesting part of a relationship is the breakup? The beginning is always sweet. You meet, flirt, and start to date. Great
moments but nothing too exciting there. But then for whatever reason the breakup. BOOM, that's when the fireworks start coming, If as much thought
went into making a good relationship as there is getting revenge after the breakup, we'd all be happy. The breakup conversation is always interesting.
Guys have a harder time with this because they try to get out without being the one at fault. Of course this never works because the guy is ALWAYS to
blame. Doesn't matter what the reason is.
"This is not working out; I still have a concussion from when you hit me in the head with that baseball bat when I was sleeping"
Her response:
If you had put your socks in the hamper instead of on the floor I wouldn't have had to hit you.
"You were cheating on me, so I'm breaking up."
Her response:
"Well, if you were treating me right, then I wouldn't had to sleep with all of those other men now would I?"
"Honey you burned down my house, I think it might be time to go our separate ways."
Her response.
"You are so petty. So your material things mean more than I do? Fine I DON'T WANT TO BE WITH ANYONE AS MATERIALISTIC AS YOU ANYWAY."
See, guys just need to accept the fact that everything is our fault as a reality. Women on the other hand have no problem with the breakup, because
the already know that their not to blame.
"You're an idiot, we're through!"
You see women have the breakup thing down to an art form.
After the Fireworks from the break up finally go out it's time to jump back on that horse and start dating again. It's scary for men these days. It used to
be I could look at a woman and tell you how old she was. Nope, not anymore. I was in the grocery store the other day when I met this woman. We hit it
off pretty well and I was right ready to go in for the number, when her mother walks up and said "Oh you must be one of Jasmine's teachers, she's really
enjoying the eleventh grade."
I almost had a heart attack. The way laws are now it's crazy. I read about a man up in New England that had taken a woman home from a bar to find out
that she was 16 and used a fake ID to get into the bar. His attorney's argument was that if you are in a place where legally everyone in the
establishment is supposed to be 21 or older it should be safe to assume they are of age. Unfortunately for him neither the girls parents nor the court
felt the same way and he went to prison for a year. You know this is going to change bar conversation forever.
"Hi, what's your name?"
"Rebecca."
"Well, Rebecca, I've been sitting over there all night thinking your too beautiful to be sitting over here all alone, wanna dance?"
"Sure."
"Great all I need you to do is sign this consent form, and I will need your birth certificate, driver's license and proof of residency. Processing time is on to
two days and if all checks out I will meet you back here on Wednesday for that dance."
As for the game, all me or anyone else can do is keep playing and one day maybe we will pass go and collect our $200.
-ADH
Over the last year, I have been reintroduced to the most complicated game ever played….the dating game. I had forgotten how much fun and lack of
fun it could be. As I get older the game gets more complicated. In your early to mid twenties people date just to date. Seldom are the long term thoughts
complicating the situation, but two people are together simply because they enjoy each others company.
Upper twenties and dare I say it thirties shuffles in a whole new set of rules. Every first date that I go on now both of us sit across from each other and
size each other up job interview style to see if suitable candidacy is there. Initial attraction is still the foundation for making it to that first date scenario.
Every "couple' starts off that way, but then the questions start quickly start kicking in; Are they good marriage? Where is this going? Are they a morning
person? How are they set financially? Do they snore? Wonder what our kids would look like" Do they even want kids" And my favorite "Is this the best I
can do? We play the game for a while go through the motions constantly aware of the decision trigger on the gun that holds the breakup bullet that may
or not be pulled. Help us all if one or the other decides to fire that shot.
Why is it that the most interesting part of a relationship is the breakup? The beginning is always sweet. You meet, flirt, and start to date. Great
moments but nothing too exciting there. But then for whatever reason the breakup. BOOM, that's when the fireworks start coming, If as much thought
went into making a good relationship as there is getting revenge after the breakup, we'd all be happy. The breakup conversation is always interesting.
Guys have a harder time with this because they try to get out without being the one at fault. Of course this never works because the guy is ALWAYS to
blame. Doesn't matter what the reason is.
"This is not working out; I still have a concussion from when you hit me in the head with that baseball bat when I was sleeping"
Her response:
If you had put your socks in the hamper instead of on the floor I wouldn't have had to hit you.
"You were cheating on me, so I'm breaking up."
Her response:
"Well, if you were treating me right, then I wouldn't had to sleep with all of those other men now would I?"
"Honey you burned down my house, I think it might be time to go our separate ways."
Her response.
"You are so petty. So your material things mean more than I do? Fine I DON'T WANT TO BE WITH ANYONE AS MATERIALISTIC AS YOU ANYWAY."
See, guys just need to accept the fact that everything is our fault as a reality. Women on the other hand have no problem with the breakup, because
the already know that their not to blame.
"You're an idiot, we're through!"
You see women have the breakup thing down to an art form.
After the Fireworks from the break up finally go out it's time to jump back on that horse and start dating again. It's scary for men these days. It used to
be I could look at a woman and tell you how old she was. Nope, not anymore. I was in the grocery store the other day when I met this woman. We hit it
off pretty well and I was right ready to go in for the number, when her mother walks up and said "Oh you must be one of Jasmine's teachers, she's really
enjoying the eleventh grade."
I almost had a heart attack. The way laws are now it's crazy. I read about a man up in New England that had taken a woman home from a bar to find out
that she was 16 and used a fake ID to get into the bar. His attorney's argument was that if you are in a place where legally everyone in the
establishment is supposed to be 21 or older it should be safe to assume they are of age. Unfortunately for him neither the girls parents nor the court
felt the same way and he went to prison for a year. You know this is going to change bar conversation forever.
"Hi, what's your name?"
"Rebecca."
"Well, Rebecca, I've been sitting over there all night thinking your too beautiful to be sitting over here all alone, wanna dance?"
"Sure."
"Great all I need you to do is sign this consent form, and I will need your birth certificate, driver's license and proof of residency. Processing time is on to
two days and if all checks out I will meet you back here on Wednesday for that dance."
As for the game, all me or anyone else can do is keep playing and one day maybe we will pass go and collect our $200.
-ADH
| Tell us your thought Use the Richmond Life Interactive form on our home page and let us know what your thinking! or CLICK HERE |
Just a Thought
As the new election season gets under way, politicians are criss crossing the country
trying to convince us why we should allow them to lead us. Everyone has an opinion of what is wrong with our country and who is to blame, but I’m not
hearing anyone stepping up to the plate to offer a solid plan of
reconstruction. In other words they are playing the “ Lets get them ticked off by pointing the finger and giving someone else to blame and hope they
hate them enough to vote for me instead” game.
This is nothing new though, we have sat in front of our televisions and watched
presidents have affairs and use the Supreme Court to get elected. Here’s what concerns me; When I talk to people about this subject they all seem to
agree that it is a problem, but the conversation ends on their part with a “Oh well, that’s just how it is.”
The problem is there because we, the people allow it to be that way. Go back to junior high history class for a minute. What are the first three words of
the Declaration of
Independence? …………………….Times up, it’s “We, the People”, not we the politicians. Now, lets go back to the first sentence of my thought, “trying to
convince us why WE SHOULD ALLOW THEM to lead us. We the people do have the power to have a say in any issue that faces this country. It’s called
a vote. This country was founded due to the taxation and exploitation of the people at the hands of an ungoverned monarchy. They had the guts to say
enough is enough.
George Washington had the opportunity to stay president as long as he wanted, but
instead opted to leave office fearing that without time restrictions on a position of such great power, the country would possibly find itself back in a
monarchy position, and not the democracy that so many had fought and died for. The basic principal for the founding of the United States was simple,
to have a place governed by the people for the people which allowed it’s citizens the
freedom to pursue life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness. Life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness, that is very important because who is really happy
with the state of our country over the last twenty years? Technology has
advanced more in those twenty years than it has in the last 200 combined yet socially we are
regressing.
We have a social security system that is forcing people who should be enjoying their golden years to work as door greeters at places like Wal- Mart just
so they can afford the highly overpriced
medications that they cannot afford any other way.
We spend billions of dollars yearly and endanger the lives of our brave soldiers trying to help other countries while a large percentage of our
population is living under the poverty level if they are lucky. The unlucky ones are trying to get to one of the thousands of under-funded homeless
shelters across the country before they run out of beds to put them in. We have national media who are afraid to really dive into these issues out of
network fears that they will lose advertising
dollars if they anger the wrong people, instead showing meaningless daily coverage of people like Paris Hilton serving a couple months in jail. Lets ask
the real questions, “Why are the politicians that are supposed to be elected to serve out the will of the people they represent not doing their jobs?
Why do we as people not hold them accountable for the job they do and the decisions they make? Why do we keep electing the same people to
congress and the senate term after term after term? The truth is while it’s easy to blame the politicians for everything that is wrong, what blame do we
honestly carry on ourselves, the people who allow the politicians to hold the positions they so dearly want to have?
As we gear up for the national elections lets
remember to keep our ears and eyes open. Lets remember that they do work for us and as anyone who has had to venture out into the fiercely
competitive and tight job market knows, to get into the door your have to really prove yourself. Make them answer the questions that really matter, and
make sure they know it they don’t follow through with all the promises they make, we the people will be the ones handing out the pink slips. If we don’t do
that we have no one to blame but
ourselves. Lets not just pursue happiness, lets
finally find it.
-ADH
As the new election season gets under way, politicians are criss crossing the country
trying to convince us why we should allow them to lead us. Everyone has an opinion of what is wrong with our country and who is to blame, but I’m not
hearing anyone stepping up to the plate to offer a solid plan of
reconstruction. In other words they are playing the “ Lets get them ticked off by pointing the finger and giving someone else to blame and hope they
hate them enough to vote for me instead” game.
This is nothing new though, we have sat in front of our televisions and watched
presidents have affairs and use the Supreme Court to get elected. Here’s what concerns me; When I talk to people about this subject they all seem to
agree that it is a problem, but the conversation ends on their part with a “Oh well, that’s just how it is.”
The problem is there because we, the people allow it to be that way. Go back to junior high history class for a minute. What are the first three words of
the Declaration of
Independence? …………………….Times up, it’s “We, the People”, not we the politicians. Now, lets go back to the first sentence of my thought, “trying to
convince us why WE SHOULD ALLOW THEM to lead us. We the people do have the power to have a say in any issue that faces this country. It’s called
a vote. This country was founded due to the taxation and exploitation of the people at the hands of an ungoverned monarchy. They had the guts to say
enough is enough.
George Washington had the opportunity to stay president as long as he wanted, but
instead opted to leave office fearing that without time restrictions on a position of such great power, the country would possibly find itself back in a
monarchy position, and not the democracy that so many had fought and died for. The basic principal for the founding of the United States was simple,
to have a place governed by the people for the people which allowed it’s citizens the
freedom to pursue life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness. Life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness, that is very important because who is really happy
with the state of our country over the last twenty years? Technology has
advanced more in those twenty years than it has in the last 200 combined yet socially we are
regressing.
We have a social security system that is forcing people who should be enjoying their golden years to work as door greeters at places like Wal- Mart just
so they can afford the highly overpriced
medications that they cannot afford any other way.
We spend billions of dollars yearly and endanger the lives of our brave soldiers trying to help other countries while a large percentage of our
population is living under the poverty level if they are lucky. The unlucky ones are trying to get to one of the thousands of under-funded homeless
shelters across the country before they run out of beds to put them in. We have national media who are afraid to really dive into these issues out of
network fears that they will lose advertising
dollars if they anger the wrong people, instead showing meaningless daily coverage of people like Paris Hilton serving a couple months in jail. Lets ask
the real questions, “Why are the politicians that are supposed to be elected to serve out the will of the people they represent not doing their jobs?
Why do we as people not hold them accountable for the job they do and the decisions they make? Why do we keep electing the same people to
congress and the senate term after term after term? The truth is while it’s easy to blame the politicians for everything that is wrong, what blame do we
honestly carry on ourselves, the people who allow the politicians to hold the positions they so dearly want to have?
As we gear up for the national elections lets
remember to keep our ears and eyes open. Lets remember that they do work for us and as anyone who has had to venture out into the fiercely
competitive and tight job market knows, to get into the door your have to really prove yourself. Make them answer the questions that really matter, and
make sure they know it they don’t follow through with all the promises they make, we the people will be the ones handing out the pink slips. If we don’t do
that we have no one to blame but
ourselves. Lets not just pursue happiness, lets
finally find it.
-ADH
| Just a Thought As I pass people everyday whether it's in the grocery store, on the street or in a club, I have noticed more and more the unwritten code that states if you make eye contact with anyone for any reason you are contractually obligated to give the customary nod and quick "How ya doing?" There are some customary unspoken rules that I am completely in agreement with and follow to the tee, such as the every other urinal in the restroom rule or the three second if it hits the floor it's still good rule. These rules make sense and not following them could cause major catastrophic repercussions felt all through society as we know it. Why do we find it necessary to ask people this knowing good and well that we really don't care how that person is doing? We know that we will get the customary "Doing good, how are you?" at which time we robotically answer back "Good." I have read that we do this because people as a culture have a craving to be recognized individually, even if it is as small of a recognition as the "How ya doing" Men being the crafty nonverbal creatures that we are have been trying to repell this rule for a few years now. We have been pushing for legislation that would replace the spoken acknowledgement rule with the equally acknowledgeable, yet words to a minimum "Head Nod-Grunt" combination. This lets people know that we know they are there without the potential complications of someone misreading the acknowledgement rule and actually telling us. Can you image the situation if everyone who we robotically asked how they are doing on a daily basis actually told us? We would go to the grocery store at 11 pm to try to get that box of cereal to get our Fruity Pebbles fix before bed, accidentally make eye contact with someone, say "How are you doing?" and it would go something like this: "I'm glad you asked, I've been dying to talk about it all day, I'm a little bummed right now, my dog Eduardo, that I had for fifteen years was ran over yesterday and it's all my fault because after I walked in on my spouse cheating on me. I left the house in such a hurry that I left the front door open and he got out, and I have been so distraught over it that I have gotten this terrible rash in parts that rashes just should not be. I tried to go down to the drug store down the street but they were closed, so now I'm here to see if they sell anything that can take the mind numbing burning away. Do you know where they keep the rash stuff here?" Scary, that's why I urge you to write your congressman and demand an amendment to the acknowledge rule that takes out any vocal exchange and instead let's go with the grunt nod approach. The world will be a better place, and you will be able to enjoy those Fruity Pebbles -ADH |
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| Just A Thought By Anthony Hudson Life and loss are two words that unfortunately always cross paths. I recently had two people that were close to me lose their lives as a result of an automobile accident. These were people still in the prime of their lives. They had what I assumed, many good years ahead of them. Unfortunately none of us are guaranteed a tomorrow or even another hour. The hourglass of our lives (that despite all of our attempts to put it on it's side) continues whether we like it or not. Since society as a whole could not function if everyone was afraid of dying all the time, we go on with our lives assuming we have plenty of time, pushing to the back of our minds that eventually all of our numbers will come up. This leads me to this months thought; why if we know that the end is our out there somewhere, do we waste the opportunities in our lives to do the things that we will regret that we had not done when that time comes? I am as guilty of this as anyone else, whether it's taking that vacation that I have been putting off for years because I am always too busy, or not picking up the phone to call people when I think about them, more often thinking to myself "I need to call them later when I'm not busy." It's usually an event of tragedy that makes us look at our lives or look at our priorities. When we are children we are told we can do anything, be anything as long as we work hard and want it enough. As we enter into adulthood those dreams are more often than not put aside so we can focus on the necessities of life like buying groceries, finding ways to deal with rising costs of living, and somewhere in all of that the child in us all slowly fades away. I remember when I was a kid my friends and I spent every day of the summer walking railroad tracks and talking about all the things that we were going to do when we "grow up". Growing up and accepting the responsibility that goes with it is a natural part of evolution and that in itself is not a bad thing. I am fortunate enough to get to meet and talk with a lot of people. I constantly hear people talk about the things they want to do "When they have the time" or "Someday". Some of these things are big, trips to Europe or starting a business. These are the dreams that we have to work for, that's takes time, effort and energy to accomplish. What surprises me, is I hear a lot things that are relatively small, such as a weekend camping trip, reconnecting with old friends, getting enough nerve up to sing on a karaoke stage or even planting a small backyard garden. We live in a society that is rewarded for our tenacity and never stop attitude, employers expect more hours, technological advancements allow us to be in constant contact with everyone everywhere and know about just about anything we want or have to know when we want it, on demand. What about the simpler pleasures that we brush to the side and put off until we have "more time?" People are always striving for the next "big stepping stone in their lives, while trying to maintain and not fall off of their current step. We have to do these things because the world is always moving and it's not going to stop for us, but taking a few minutes or even an hour a day out to enjoy some of the simpler enjoyments of live can help us find a sense of peace in what has become a very chaotic world. So plant your garden, take an overnight camping trip, get on stage and sing your heart out (bad notes and all), or pick up the phone and let the people in your lives know that you were thinking about them, because we never know when that last peace of sand will fall through the hourglass and we will run out of opportunities to "do it later." I want to leave you this month with a poem that was brought to me. The author is unknown except for it was written by a cancer patient that was losing their battle and knew the end was near. This is their advice for us: Click here to read -ADH |